Finished viewing: 11:30 PM 02.26.12
Synopsis: Some guy (SG) is a big campaigner for George Clooney's character, Morris, in what appears to be the Democratic Primary of Ohio between the frontrunner and an up and comer who's campaign is beginning to pick up speed in a bizarro 2012 election where a Republican won in 08. The Ohio primary is being held on the Ides of March, hence the title of the film. Paul Giamatti's character, lead strategist for the up and comer, attempts to recruit SG to the other team. Without going into to many other spoilers here, this event sparks a disillusionment in SG that--along with other plot events--allows him to become the lead strategist for Morris and help him more or less secure the Democratic nomination.
Movies it tried to be: Citizen Kane, Scarface, the Godfather, even Apocalypse Now if you wanted to stretch it.
Did it succeed: Hell no.
Highs: Engaging plot, plenty of intense political intrigue without needing a thorough knowledge of the subject, good cinematography.
Lows: Characterization, namely the female character. Writing seems lumbering and rough at points.
My thoughts: Where to even begin? The movie was fun, for sure. Although it is somewhat lengthy, it flies by--to the point where you are surprised it's over because of how fast it went.
However, the movie tried to be a tragedy and flat out failed. Why? Two reasons. First of all, the development of SG's downfall is not well illustrated at all. He is portrayed in the first act as a chipper, motivated campaign aide who loyally believes Morris is the one who will change Washington. He has faith in his presidential candidate and the chief strategist, Paul. He is also stated to be a near genius for the cause, quickly rising through the ranks with his attitude, tactics, and strategy for the campaign. Unfortunately for SG and the film on the whole, these aptitudes are never shown on screen. They should be shown in the first act, but the only time it even gets close is in the opening scene when he is testing a talking point on stage before a debate. It is later mentioned that the talking point was his idea. Everything else, even that point, is hearsay.
Then, there's the whole "corruption" itself. First, SG's falling out is over meeting with Paul Giamatti's character, which--once he's revealed the meeting to his boss--leads to his firing. Paul expresses anger at SG for not mentioning the meeting during a phone call: where SG initially wanted to tell him about the meeting, but changed his mind. What leads to the firing is confusing. Is it the fact he met with Giamatti in the first place, or the fact that it took a while for him to tell his boss? This point is never really made clear. However, SG's firing occurs near the same time as a potentially big scandal of Morris is revealed to him--which essentially ruins Morris' image in SG's eyes. However, although this scandal occurs before his firing, there really is no film time spent on how SG deals with this situation emotionally. He seems to just sweep it under the rug and forget about it until he gets fired, at which he immediately goes back to Giamatti to use it as a prize for hiring him on the other team's staff. This plan itself backfires, so SG goes back to Morris and uses his knowledge of the scandal to blackmail his way to getting Paul's job. THIS IS THE PROBLEM WITH THE FILM!!!! The writing paints SG as two-toned, pure black and white. He goes from a good guy (we guess, outside of his monologue about how he believes in Morris, this "innocent" section is never really fleshed out) to conniving bastard in three seconds. There is no gray area, no chance for SG to be fleshed out as a sympathetic character. SG and the movie itself emits no pathos, which a tragedy such as this should have. The film suffers for it.
Lastly, the female character and the source of the scandal serves as one of the backwards female characters in a film I have seen in a long time. Her whole purpose in the film is to have sex with SG, get pregnant, and kill herself over her pregnancy. Welp, guess that characterizes women pretty well, huh?
Overall, the movie provides plenty of entertainment; and I enjoyed it. But great movie it was clearly not. It did not deserve to be considered one of the best films of 2012, and it was not.
Rating: 3.25 out of 5 stars.
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Friday, February 24, 2012
The cat
Everyday I hear without fail a cat’s meow
Outside my apartment between five and seven
I go inside and see, but remember those days when
Things weren’t what they are right now. A phone call at 8 pm
Desperate and crying from a near forgotten friend
What do I do, I don’t know how to do it, advice seeking
And obtained from a senseless sage who’s travels leave him
With idle understanding of the situation
Given and taken, soothing balm. Comprehended?
Remains to be seen. It wasn’t, and that one attempt
At reconciliation, further absolving of the crime
Laid flat, warm and ironed with the imprint of
The worn edges it uses as ageless support
I hear that poor, sad creature and my heart jumps up
The mournful wails call for attention, far from love
How many hours a day do I waste playing
Solitaire on my computer? Taking great
Time and effort; stacking, organizing, and placing
Piles of cards to just have them fly back at you
All or nothing it leads up to a victory
Percentage of only eleven, to the point
That you reset before the loss just to
Stop the drop, a fall that coincides not only
With numbers but also pride, a game just for fun?
Upon those calls I abandon my involvement,
place my coat upon my shoulders and head outside
He insists upon anger, scorn, and contempt
Upon those who are not settled with self fulfillment.
Those who venture to the outside and attempt to improve
Themselves not solely on their personal merits but
The ones granted to them by prescient judges
Utter disdain and shines his altruistic beacon
On his one true path, “Constance, Dilligence!”
He cries on ears deaf ears and those willfully
Ignoring his noble warning.
He wins, by God, he wins. And holds his trophy high.
And those close by laud most abundant
But those further squint and ponder
the true essence of the commotion.
I make it outside in haste, scanning all of sight
Straining self to recover the sounds of pure fright
Honestly, what have I got to lose? It’s a choice
Between where the comfort lies and where more comfort
Remains, family, friends, and choiced love ones pertain
Petrified in a symbiotic state,alas
Choices could be easy when forces pull on sides
Splitting, like bread on a sandwich, talking smiles
Friendly faces posted, what to do? The family feigns familiar
But when arrived backstabbing and ethanol sipping occurs
In such rapid succession, daily, that you spend your days in
A corner afraid to talk, is that destination
Really providence in itself? Spirals down to nowhere
What’s yours is mine, and mine is yours
Millions made or pennies squandered. Terrible those
Who’s idealistic presence wish it wasn’t so
The cat is nowhere, the calls are quiet, and
Yet, I swear I heard them, those calls persist daily,
I never want to hear from you again, those words
Persist through everyone’s vocabulary, slurred
Speech or restless anger. No matter. The breast of
The loveless virgin still tastes sweet, though dawn and dusk
Lie in romantic harmony with each other,
Tears spilling off their cheek in bitter freedom yet
sorrow lasting eternal, licked off each other
with lustful laps exhibited by swine. Glossy
Romance, glory, beauty intwined. Unfortunate
Maybe those who stray away, who look to the white
Ceiling with it’s dried paint swelled through its own forced weight.
The cat, it never comes. Wails by day like clockwork.
How I wish I could take a pneumatic plunger,
And stun its head to unconsciousness, so that I
Could never hear those forlorn cries ever again.
Outside my apartment between five and seven
I go inside and see, but remember those days when
Things weren’t what they are right now. A phone call at 8 pm
Desperate and crying from a near forgotten friend
What do I do, I don’t know how to do it, advice seeking
And obtained from a senseless sage who’s travels leave him
With idle understanding of the situation
Given and taken, soothing balm. Comprehended?
Remains to be seen. It wasn’t, and that one attempt
At reconciliation, further absolving of the crime
Laid flat, warm and ironed with the imprint of
The worn edges it uses as ageless support
I hear that poor, sad creature and my heart jumps up
The mournful wails call for attention, far from love
How many hours a day do I waste playing
Solitaire on my computer? Taking great
Time and effort; stacking, organizing, and placing
Piles of cards to just have them fly back at you
All or nothing it leads up to a victory
Percentage of only eleven, to the point
That you reset before the loss just to
Stop the drop, a fall that coincides not only
With numbers but also pride, a game just for fun?
Upon those calls I abandon my involvement,
place my coat upon my shoulders and head outside
He insists upon anger, scorn, and contempt
Upon those who are not settled with self fulfillment.
Those who venture to the outside and attempt to improve
Themselves not solely on their personal merits but
The ones granted to them by prescient judges
Utter disdain and shines his altruistic beacon
On his one true path, “Constance, Dilligence!”
He cries on ears deaf ears and those willfully
Ignoring his noble warning.
He wins, by God, he wins. And holds his trophy high.
And those close by laud most abundant
But those further squint and ponder
the true essence of the commotion.
I make it outside in haste, scanning all of sight
Straining self to recover the sounds of pure fright
Honestly, what have I got to lose? It’s a choice
Between where the comfort lies and where more comfort
Remains, family, friends, and choiced love ones pertain
Petrified in a symbiotic state,alas
Choices could be easy when forces pull on sides
Splitting, like bread on a sandwich, talking smiles
Friendly faces posted, what to do? The family feigns familiar
But when arrived backstabbing and ethanol sipping occurs
In such rapid succession, daily, that you spend your days in
A corner afraid to talk, is that destination
Really providence in itself? Spirals down to nowhere
What’s yours is mine, and mine is yours
Millions made or pennies squandered. Terrible those
Who’s idealistic presence wish it wasn’t so
The cat is nowhere, the calls are quiet, and
Yet, I swear I heard them, those calls persist daily,
I never want to hear from you again, those words
Persist through everyone’s vocabulary, slurred
Speech or restless anger. No matter. The breast of
The loveless virgin still tastes sweet, though dawn and dusk
Lie in romantic harmony with each other,
Tears spilling off their cheek in bitter freedom yet
sorrow lasting eternal, licked off each other
with lustful laps exhibited by swine. Glossy
Romance, glory, beauty intwined. Unfortunate
Maybe those who stray away, who look to the white
Ceiling with it’s dried paint swelled through its own forced weight.
The cat, it never comes. Wails by day like clockwork.
How I wish I could take a pneumatic plunger,
And stun its head to unconsciousness, so that I
Could never hear those forlorn cries ever again.
Monday, February 20, 2012
Tales from the Crypt: The Man Who Was Death (TV episode)
Watched: 02.19.12
Random Fact: First episode of the series.
Did I read the comic book version?: Yes
Similarity?: Eh...fairly similar but with more adult themes.
Synopsis: Executioner really enjoys his job. The state for which he works outlaws the death penalty, and the penitentiary for which he works fires him. After mulling over unemployment, he decides to kill people who are guilty but get off free from their crimes. He finally gets caught and, wouldn't you know it?, the state just recently reinstates the death penalty, allowing the executioner to get his just desserts. Also, boobies. Lots and lots of boobies.
Highs: The narrative. The fourth wall-breaking style of narration and the protagonist's accent was soothing. Opening scene is extremely creepy.
Lows: Death scenes were bush league. The plot is very monolithic, there are no real twists and turns, and there is barely any form of development.
Comic synopsis?: Honestly, I barely remember. At this point I've probably watched the TV version more than I've read the comic version, so it screws with my memory. The executioner was bald, he may have worn a mask, and he may have adopted more of a prototype slasher movie antagonist style. I think there was more intrigue involving his eventual capture.
Views: First of all, if I recall correctly this show was a hit when it first came out on HBO in 1989 (Wikipedia confirms, it ran for seven seasons and had several spinoffs). That's another thing, the show came out in 1989; taking that into consideration, I have to be more forgiving with the special effects while watching this show. Secondly, this show was on HBO. At the time, HBO was still in it's "It's not TV, it's HBO" phase, where it really wanted to relish the fact it did not have the same rigorous censorship standards that network and cable television had. Therefore, the show shoehorned needless sexuality whenever it could. This is kind of a treat for me, as I guess I get to see excessive full frontal nudity with my horror; however, considering I read the comics (made for kids) the stories were based upon first, this excessive shoehorning will be even more obvious to me. Yes, the comic book nerd in me is very small, but very big when it comes to the series from which this show came.
Alright, now on to the episode itself. There's really not much to say. There was barely any development outside of his firing and murder. The opening scene, in which a convicted murderer is put to death with the electric chair despite his pleading desperation, is surprisingly creepy and dreadful. After the executioner starts his killing, the plot practically drops off the face of the earth. There is no real exploration of why he kills, outside of a naive bartender putting the idea indirectly into his head. Yes, he was technically a state-funded killer, but that doesn't give him an inspiration to take the law into his hands. That wasn't his job and he never expressed a real motivation in putting people to death because they deserved it. Also, if anything his motivation is electricity, as he seems to have more respect and interest in that then the actual "art" of execution. Why does he kill? It makes no sense.
Also, his killing consists of three independent scenes. The second and third involve gratuitous nudity; one involving killing a couple while they are in a hot tub, and the other attempt involving a public execution of a dancer at a strip club. Notice I said attempt because he is caught in the act. How is he caught? It doesn't explain, he is caught and convicted and put to death in an ironic similarity to the first scene.
A good horror story? Not really, there is nothing scary about it outside of the heart-wrenching scene at the beginning and the death scenes--all involving electricity. The narrative style is unique and somewhat interesting, as the main character explains the events in a story involving plenty of metaphors, symbols, and emotionless yet superfluous details.
Overall, the shortfalls of the plot in this episode highlight the true motivations of the director and perhaps the show. It's not so much about the cohesiveness of the story as it is the visuals. Not so much in this one, outside of the nudity, but the show goes more for visual pleasure, whether it be horror or sex. Unfortunately for show, the dated look of it REALLY hurts. While these scenes may have been shocking for the contemporary audience, my visually spoiled eye loses all fear and kills the effect for which the show was going. Except for the nudity, that will always be timeless.
Rating: 2.0/5
Random Fact: First episode of the series.
Did I read the comic book version?: Yes
Similarity?: Eh...fairly similar but with more adult themes.
Synopsis: Executioner really enjoys his job. The state for which he works outlaws the death penalty, and the penitentiary for which he works fires him. After mulling over unemployment, he decides to kill people who are guilty but get off free from their crimes. He finally gets caught and, wouldn't you know it?, the state just recently reinstates the death penalty, allowing the executioner to get his just desserts. Also, boobies. Lots and lots of boobies.
Highs: The narrative. The fourth wall-breaking style of narration and the protagonist's accent was soothing. Opening scene is extremely creepy.
Lows: Death scenes were bush league. The plot is very monolithic, there are no real twists and turns, and there is barely any form of development.
Comic synopsis?: Honestly, I barely remember. At this point I've probably watched the TV version more than I've read the comic version, so it screws with my memory. The executioner was bald, he may have worn a mask, and he may have adopted more of a prototype slasher movie antagonist style. I think there was more intrigue involving his eventual capture.
Views: First of all, if I recall correctly this show was a hit when it first came out on HBO in 1989 (Wikipedia confirms, it ran for seven seasons and had several spinoffs). That's another thing, the show came out in 1989; taking that into consideration, I have to be more forgiving with the special effects while watching this show. Secondly, this show was on HBO. At the time, HBO was still in it's "It's not TV, it's HBO" phase, where it really wanted to relish the fact it did not have the same rigorous censorship standards that network and cable television had. Therefore, the show shoehorned needless sexuality whenever it could. This is kind of a treat for me, as I guess I get to see excessive full frontal nudity with my horror; however, considering I read the comics (made for kids) the stories were based upon first, this excessive shoehorning will be even more obvious to me. Yes, the comic book nerd in me is very small, but very big when it comes to the series from which this show came.
Alright, now on to the episode itself. There's really not much to say. There was barely any development outside of his firing and murder. The opening scene, in which a convicted murderer is put to death with the electric chair despite his pleading desperation, is surprisingly creepy and dreadful. After the executioner starts his killing, the plot practically drops off the face of the earth. There is no real exploration of why he kills, outside of a naive bartender putting the idea indirectly into his head. Yes, he was technically a state-funded killer, but that doesn't give him an inspiration to take the law into his hands. That wasn't his job and he never expressed a real motivation in putting people to death because they deserved it. Also, if anything his motivation is electricity, as he seems to have more respect and interest in that then the actual "art" of execution. Why does he kill? It makes no sense.
Also, his killing consists of three independent scenes. The second and third involve gratuitous nudity; one involving killing a couple while they are in a hot tub, and the other attempt involving a public execution of a dancer at a strip club. Notice I said attempt because he is caught in the act. How is he caught? It doesn't explain, he is caught and convicted and put to death in an ironic similarity to the first scene.
A good horror story? Not really, there is nothing scary about it outside of the heart-wrenching scene at the beginning and the death scenes--all involving electricity. The narrative style is unique and somewhat interesting, as the main character explains the events in a story involving plenty of metaphors, symbols, and emotionless yet superfluous details.
Overall, the shortfalls of the plot in this episode highlight the true motivations of the director and perhaps the show. It's not so much about the cohesiveness of the story as it is the visuals. Not so much in this one, outside of the nudity, but the show goes more for visual pleasure, whether it be horror or sex. Unfortunately for show, the dated look of it REALLY hurts. While these scenes may have been shocking for the contemporary audience, my visually spoiled eye loses all fear and kills the effect for which the show was going. Except for the nudity, that will always be timeless.
Rating: 2.0/5
Delocated!--Bar Mitzvah (TV episode)
Watched: 02.20.12
Rewatched?: Twice since
Synopsis: A man, "Jon", witnesses a murder committed by a Russian mob group. After testifying to the authorities, he is placed under witness protection. He also gets his own reality show. In this particular episode, his son is having his bar mitzvah; and his wife is seeing the federal agent assigned to protect her. In celebration of the bar mitzvah, "Jon"'s wife and son are reassuming their identity, and that--combined with his son's decision on how to style his bar mitzvah--leaves a sour taste in his mouth.
Highs: "Jon"'s speech, the ska puns, "Jon"'s son "disgracing God".
Lows: Ska is annoying.
Views: This show is absolutely hilarious. The combination of the absurdity of the situation (a family in a witness protection program being given their own reality show), combined with the deadpan delivery make it a real joy to watch. It's not for everyone. I've watched with someone, and the fact she didn't appreciate was obvious. This episode in itself is probably my favorite so far. "Jon"'s angst at his estranged wife seeing another man being translated to his vocal displeasure at the style of his son's bar mitzvah is hilarious. It just has that "laugh at awkward situations" humor down literally to an art form. Filled with great one liners. A perfect episode to start watching the show.
Rating: 4.5 out of 5 stars.
Rewatched?: Twice since
Synopsis: A man, "Jon", witnesses a murder committed by a Russian mob group. After testifying to the authorities, he is placed under witness protection. He also gets his own reality show. In this particular episode, his son is having his bar mitzvah; and his wife is seeing the federal agent assigned to protect her. In celebration of the bar mitzvah, "Jon"'s wife and son are reassuming their identity, and that--combined with his son's decision on how to style his bar mitzvah--leaves a sour taste in his mouth.
Highs: "Jon"'s speech, the ska puns, "Jon"'s son "disgracing God".
Lows: Ska is annoying.
Views: This show is absolutely hilarious. The combination of the absurdity of the situation (a family in a witness protection program being given their own reality show), combined with the deadpan delivery make it a real joy to watch. It's not for everyone. I've watched with someone, and the fact she didn't appreciate was obvious. This episode in itself is probably my favorite so far. "Jon"'s angst at his estranged wife seeing another man being translated to his vocal displeasure at the style of his son's bar mitzvah is hilarious. It just has that "laugh at awkward situations" humor down literally to an art form. Filled with great one liners. A perfect episode to start watching the show.
Rating: 4.5 out of 5 stars.
Sloppy Seconds: The Tucker Max Leftovers (non-fiction book)
Finished: 02.20.12
Did I pay for it?: No
Do I feel rewarded for reading this?: No
Do I feel bad for reading this?: Kind of.
Length: Approximately 220 pages.
Synopsis: More of the same from Tucker Max. This is a "best of the rest" collection, as he is retiring from the "fratire" genre that made him famous and wanted to scrape the bottom of the barrel to give his fans what had to be the entirety of his creative output. The book consists of two parts: the first being an "advertising" section, containing a story from each of his previous three books that he considers some of his personal favorites; the second consists of stories that he felt did not make the cut for his other books. Stories in the section section include random tidbits, more stories making fun of fat girls, a story on his trip to Nantucket, and a trip to the doctors after some sexual escapades in front of an x-ray machine.
Highs: The drunken showing to a Muslim wedding, some of his tidbits, and the stories about how guys will try to pose as him so they can meet women (for the sheer absurdity of it). The broken headboard story.
Lows: The fact over a quarter of the book is already published material. The story about a girl using Tucker to get back at an ex girlfriend. The DBA story that halfway consisted of just letters in a newspaper.
Views: I got this book for free off Amazon.com for my Kindle, and I am glad for that because I would have been very upset if I paid more than a quarter for it. The fact that over a quarter of the books is recycled material used in an "advertising" sense is bad enough and puts a bad taste in a reader's mouth. Granted, the reasoning behind it is understandable: Max feels that the fact this book is free will attract new readers, and--after reading a few of these "favorite" stories--they will be enticed to buy his other books. I get that and think it's clever. What I don't appreciate is the fact this point was not advertised anywhere--on his site, Amazon, nowhere. What further hurts my opinion on this book is that I recognize several of these stories from his website before he dramatically reduced the amount of material on his site. Two or three of the stories in the book may have been original. What's even worse is the fact these stories were only removed less than two years ago, so it's not like I'm remembering these stories from a very long time ago or anything. A good bit of what I think was new material was very poor and appeared to just be added so to pad the length of the book.
That being said, it's not that bad--especially for someone who may be new to the author. While these stories are recycled, they really aren't that bad and show the author while he was probably at his peak--before he became spoiled with the success of his first book. I laughed several times, and--in a strange inversion of my opinion on his last book--felt that the bad stories in this one were not as bad as the some of the stories in Hilarity Ensues. Highlights for me include the Muslim wedding story (which had some hilarious one-liners), parts of the "Nantucket Sucks" story, and several of his little blurbs (one that comes to mind is his visit to a Chinese restaurant, where he sees two Chinese children making fun of white Americans by stretching their eyes out and saying "Baseball! Hot Dogs! Baseball! Hot Dogs!"). Unfortunately, the lack of effort in writing this is easily seen and detracts from the experience.
With the conclusion of this book, I plan on stepping away from Tucker Max. His stories were hilarious, and I've enjoyed them throughout the latter part of my life. However, he has retired from this genre; and I'm more than ready to move on to greener pastures.
Rating: 1.75 out of 5 stars.
Did I pay for it?: No
Do I feel rewarded for reading this?: No
Do I feel bad for reading this?: Kind of.
Length: Approximately 220 pages.
Synopsis: More of the same from Tucker Max. This is a "best of the rest" collection, as he is retiring from the "fratire" genre that made him famous and wanted to scrape the bottom of the barrel to give his fans what had to be the entirety of his creative output. The book consists of two parts: the first being an "advertising" section, containing a story from each of his previous three books that he considers some of his personal favorites; the second consists of stories that he felt did not make the cut for his other books. Stories in the section section include random tidbits, more stories making fun of fat girls, a story on his trip to Nantucket, and a trip to the doctors after some sexual escapades in front of an x-ray machine.
Highs: The drunken showing to a Muslim wedding, some of his tidbits, and the stories about how guys will try to pose as him so they can meet women (for the sheer absurdity of it). The broken headboard story.
Lows: The fact over a quarter of the book is already published material. The story about a girl using Tucker to get back at an ex girlfriend. The DBA story that halfway consisted of just letters in a newspaper.
Views: I got this book for free off Amazon.com for my Kindle, and I am glad for that because I would have been very upset if I paid more than a quarter for it. The fact that over a quarter of the books is recycled material used in an "advertising" sense is bad enough and puts a bad taste in a reader's mouth. Granted, the reasoning behind it is understandable: Max feels that the fact this book is free will attract new readers, and--after reading a few of these "favorite" stories--they will be enticed to buy his other books. I get that and think it's clever. What I don't appreciate is the fact this point was not advertised anywhere--on his site, Amazon, nowhere. What further hurts my opinion on this book is that I recognize several of these stories from his website before he dramatically reduced the amount of material on his site. Two or three of the stories in the book may have been original. What's even worse is the fact these stories were only removed less than two years ago, so it's not like I'm remembering these stories from a very long time ago or anything. A good bit of what I think was new material was very poor and appeared to just be added so to pad the length of the book.
That being said, it's not that bad--especially for someone who may be new to the author. While these stories are recycled, they really aren't that bad and show the author while he was probably at his peak--before he became spoiled with the success of his first book. I laughed several times, and--in a strange inversion of my opinion on his last book--felt that the bad stories in this one were not as bad as the some of the stories in Hilarity Ensues. Highlights for me include the Muslim wedding story (which had some hilarious one-liners), parts of the "Nantucket Sucks" story, and several of his little blurbs (one that comes to mind is his visit to a Chinese restaurant, where he sees two Chinese children making fun of white Americans by stretching their eyes out and saying "Baseball! Hot Dogs! Baseball! Hot Dogs!"). Unfortunately, the lack of effort in writing this is easily seen and detracts from the experience.
With the conclusion of this book, I plan on stepping away from Tucker Max. His stories were hilarious, and I've enjoyed them throughout the latter part of my life. However, he has retired from this genre; and I'm more than ready to move on to greener pastures.
Rating: 1.75 out of 5 stars.
Sunday, February 19, 2012
Hilarity Ensues (non-fiction book)
Completed: 02.19.12
Author: Tucker Max
Special notes: Purchased on Kindle
Synopsis: Third book from Tucker Max exploring his past endeavors involving random sex, drinking, and other forms of debauchery. Selected stories include: His time in Cancun while enrolled in law school, hilarious sexting moments with random fans, the story about his relationship with a former Miss Vermont pageant winner, and the bachelor parties and weddings of his various law school friends.
Highs: All of the sexting conversations, "Drugs are Bad, MMMMMK?", most of the bachelor party/wedding stories.
Lows: World's Deadliest Vacation, Tucker Max: Knee Abuser, and the added content in the MissVermont story.
Thoughts: I really want to rag on it, but it wasn't that bad. On the whole, it was better than Assholes Finish First, which had quite a few misses, several stories that were originally on his website, and the entire second half was, even admittedly, lower quality than the first half. Thinking about it, though, the overall quality of the good stories from Assholes Finish First were better than Hilarity Ensues. Neither were as good as I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell, however.
Hilarity Ensues had a couple of really good stories (Drugs are Bad, Mmmmmk?, most of the wedding/bachelor party stories, and all of the Sexting bits), but nothing that I'd really put in the ranks of his "best" stories (which AFF had at least one or two). It also has what, in my opinion, is his worst long story (The World's Most Dangerous Vacation, or whatever) where he visits the crew of Deadliest Catch or whatever the crab fishing boat show on Discovery is called. Cool, Tucker, you puked a ton on the boat ride there. Awesome.
He tends to center his books around one major anchoring story (Tuckerfest in AFF and the Austin Road Trip in IHTSBIH), and this one's is apparently the Miss Vermont story. It's kind of a disappointment that this is his big story, since most of it was already on his website for years before he conveniently took it down shortly before I suppose he decided to put it in his book. He advertised that there would be plenty of new stuff in the story to make people who've read it before want to read it again, but...it's not really worth it. He also gets pretty preachy at a few points, both in this story itself and in the entire book. It's also kind of sad that he rags on this girl throughout the meat of his story, but at the end decides that it's the mom's fault her daughter is the way she is and goes at it with her mother. However, he doesn't apologize or think twice about what he's said about MissVermont. Tucker has always come off as charismatic and justified in his asshole behavior, but at points during this story he really looked like a real jerk.
Naturally, his books are never supposed to be taken under a refined literary scope, and I won't do that. I was a fan of his since I was an immature high schooler reading his website, and I've kept up with him since when I need a laugh or two. So, in the end, I'd rank this one second on the whole but not to expect a lot from the individual stories.
Would I read it again? Yeah probably, but not for a few years.
Rating: 3.25 out of 5 stars
Author: Tucker Max
Special notes: Purchased on Kindle
Synopsis: Third book from Tucker Max exploring his past endeavors involving random sex, drinking, and other forms of debauchery. Selected stories include: His time in Cancun while enrolled in law school, hilarious sexting moments with random fans, the story about his relationship with a former Miss Vermont pageant winner, and the bachelor parties and weddings of his various law school friends.
Highs: All of the sexting conversations, "Drugs are Bad, MMMMMK?", most of the bachelor party/wedding stories.
Lows: World's Deadliest Vacation, Tucker Max: Knee Abuser, and the added content in the MissVermont story.
Thoughts: I really want to rag on it, but it wasn't that bad. On the whole, it was better than Assholes Finish First, which had quite a few misses, several stories that were originally on his website, and the entire second half was, even admittedly, lower quality than the first half. Thinking about it, though, the overall quality of the good stories from Assholes Finish First were better than Hilarity Ensues. Neither were as good as I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell, however.
Hilarity Ensues had a couple of really good stories (Drugs are Bad, Mmmmmk?, most of the wedding/bachelor party stories, and all of the Sexting bits), but nothing that I'd really put in the ranks of his "best" stories (which AFF had at least one or two). It also has what, in my opinion, is his worst long story (The World's Most Dangerous Vacation, or whatever) where he visits the crew of Deadliest Catch or whatever the crab fishing boat show on Discovery is called. Cool, Tucker, you puked a ton on the boat ride there. Awesome.
He tends to center his books around one major anchoring story (Tuckerfest in AFF and the Austin Road Trip in IHTSBIH), and this one's is apparently the Miss Vermont story. It's kind of a disappointment that this is his big story, since most of it was already on his website for years before he conveniently took it down shortly before I suppose he decided to put it in his book. He advertised that there would be plenty of new stuff in the story to make people who've read it before want to read it again, but...it's not really worth it. He also gets pretty preachy at a few points, both in this story itself and in the entire book. It's also kind of sad that he rags on this girl throughout the meat of his story, but at the end decides that it's the mom's fault her daughter is the way she is and goes at it with her mother. However, he doesn't apologize or think twice about what he's said about MissVermont. Tucker has always come off as charismatic and justified in his asshole behavior, but at points during this story he really looked like a real jerk.
Naturally, his books are never supposed to be taken under a refined literary scope, and I won't do that. I was a fan of his since I was an immature high schooler reading his website, and I've kept up with him since when I need a laugh or two. So, in the end, I'd rank this one second on the whole but not to expect a lot from the individual stories.
Would I read it again? Yeah probably, but not for a few years.
Rating: 3.25 out of 5 stars
Saturday, February 18, 2012
Jersey Shore Season 5 Episode 7
Viewed: 10:30-11:20, 02.18.12
Synopsis: Rodger and Jwoww get over their problems rather quickly at the beginning of the episode. Jwoww has issues trusting Rodger and makes everything about her. Jwoww sees the error in her ways. Meatballs see the error in their way of dodging work the previous day and make a cake for Danny in apology. The next morning, a chunk of the cake is gone; and Mike is considered the top suspect since he was up the latest. Frustrated at having her tenth UTI in the past year, Snooki goes to the doctor. Snooki is not allowed to drink excessively. Mike goes to work by himself without Jwoww and Snooki. Danny is even angrier that Snooki ditches work again, although she was at the doctor at the time. They eventually show up, and Danny is like whatever. They are tasked to put heavy boxes in the shed. Mike is accused of eating the cake, and he denies it vehemently--considering he is on a diet. Mike is upset that he is accused without proof and is blamed for everything. Pauly D is revealed as the culprit. Meatballs apologize for the baseless accusation, but Mike is still upset about the situation (heh). Mike plans on bringing some friends over to visit. Group prepares to go to Karma. There, Mike meets up with Bobby, his friend. Snooki drinks anyway, against her doctor's advice. Mike meets Paula at Karma. The crew leaves Karma. Pauly says "YEAH BUDDY". Paula is Mike's main squeeze at this point, and Mike is seriously considering dating her. It is confirmed Mike and Paula have sex, and Sammi decides she likes Paula. Pauly and Vinny joke about being in a relationship. Vinny loses his keys, but finds them without consequence. Joey and Deena are going to meet at Janks. Sammi, Ronnie, Pauly, Deena, and Vinny go to Janks. Ronnie gets hammered, and Sammi is ok with it. Mike is obviously high out of his mind at the house, flirting with Snooki. Mike wants to have sex with Snooki, and she shuts him down. Joey is into Deena. The crew returns home. Pauly decides to mess with Deena before she has sex with Joey by putting food on her bed. Deena accuses Pauly of the prank, but Pauly convinces her it wasn't he who did it. Snooki messes with Joey as he sits on the couch. Snooki wants to watch them have sex. Afterwards, Deena's back hurts. Pauly and Vinny leave once again. Mike calls the Unit to assure he is coming out that night. They discuss the plan to reveal that Snooki cheated on Jionni. Jwoww wears a really revealing outfit for Karma that night, since Rodger is going with them. Rodger approves, but he seems slightly angsty. They go to Karma, and a random dude gets kicked out. Jwoww expresses displeasure at the crowd at Karma. A heckler tries to grab on Jwoww's dress, and Rodger tells him to leave. This aggravates the heckler, and he throws a punch at Rodger as the episode ends.
Highs: The cake drama. Mike high and flirting with Snooki. Sammi having more of a role for once.
Lows: Snooki going to the doctor. Vinny losing his keys in the protein shake store. Deena hook up scene. Deena's back problems, really anything involving Deena.
Views: Jersey Shore has begun to dry out lately. Instead of examining guido culture, hooking up with girls at the clubs, and getting into arguments amongst themselves and with strangers, the show has focused mostly on the inner dynamics of the crew. Several of the characters, namely Sammi, Jwoww, Mike, and Ronnie, have basically become background to the antics of mostly the meatballs, who's slapstick and feigned stupidity were a novelty when Deena first arrived but has now worn thin. This episode, however was refreshing as the meatballs took a backseat to the lives of Jwoww and Mike. The final scene of a fight between Rodger and the heckler will lead to revitalized interest in the next episode. Overall, an episode that reinvigorated the season.
Rating: 3.0 out of 5 stars.
Rating:
Synopsis: Rodger and Jwoww get over their problems rather quickly at the beginning of the episode. Jwoww has issues trusting Rodger and makes everything about her. Jwoww sees the error in her ways. Meatballs see the error in their way of dodging work the previous day and make a cake for Danny in apology. The next morning, a chunk of the cake is gone; and Mike is considered the top suspect since he was up the latest. Frustrated at having her tenth UTI in the past year, Snooki goes to the doctor. Snooki is not allowed to drink excessively. Mike goes to work by himself without Jwoww and Snooki. Danny is even angrier that Snooki ditches work again, although she was at the doctor at the time. They eventually show up, and Danny is like whatever. They are tasked to put heavy boxes in the shed. Mike is accused of eating the cake, and he denies it vehemently--considering he is on a diet. Mike is upset that he is accused without proof and is blamed for everything. Pauly D is revealed as the culprit. Meatballs apologize for the baseless accusation, but Mike is still upset about the situation (heh). Mike plans on bringing some friends over to visit. Group prepares to go to Karma. There, Mike meets up with Bobby, his friend. Snooki drinks anyway, against her doctor's advice. Mike meets Paula at Karma. The crew leaves Karma. Pauly says "YEAH BUDDY". Paula is Mike's main squeeze at this point, and Mike is seriously considering dating her. It is confirmed Mike and Paula have sex, and Sammi decides she likes Paula. Pauly and Vinny joke about being in a relationship. Vinny loses his keys, but finds them without consequence. Joey and Deena are going to meet at Janks. Sammi, Ronnie, Pauly, Deena, and Vinny go to Janks. Ronnie gets hammered, and Sammi is ok with it. Mike is obviously high out of his mind at the house, flirting with Snooki. Mike wants to have sex with Snooki, and she shuts him down. Joey is into Deena. The crew returns home. Pauly decides to mess with Deena before she has sex with Joey by putting food on her bed. Deena accuses Pauly of the prank, but Pauly convinces her it wasn't he who did it. Snooki messes with Joey as he sits on the couch. Snooki wants to watch them have sex. Afterwards, Deena's back hurts. Pauly and Vinny leave once again. Mike calls the Unit to assure he is coming out that night. They discuss the plan to reveal that Snooki cheated on Jionni. Jwoww wears a really revealing outfit for Karma that night, since Rodger is going with them. Rodger approves, but he seems slightly angsty. They go to Karma, and a random dude gets kicked out. Jwoww expresses displeasure at the crowd at Karma. A heckler tries to grab on Jwoww's dress, and Rodger tells him to leave. This aggravates the heckler, and he throws a punch at Rodger as the episode ends.
Highs: The cake drama. Mike high and flirting with Snooki. Sammi having more of a role for once.
Lows: Snooki going to the doctor. Vinny losing his keys in the protein shake store. Deena hook up scene. Deena's back problems, really anything involving Deena.
Views: Jersey Shore has begun to dry out lately. Instead of examining guido culture, hooking up with girls at the clubs, and getting into arguments amongst themselves and with strangers, the show has focused mostly on the inner dynamics of the crew. Several of the characters, namely Sammi, Jwoww, Mike, and Ronnie, have basically become background to the antics of mostly the meatballs, who's slapstick and feigned stupidity were a novelty when Deena first arrived but has now worn thin. This episode, however was refreshing as the meatballs took a backseat to the lives of Jwoww and Mike. The final scene of a fight between Rodger and the heckler will lead to revitalized interest in the next episode. Overall, an episode that reinvigorated the season.
Rating: 3.0 out of 5 stars.
Rating:
Thursday, February 16, 2012
alliteration
Hours tick tock to folding skin and wrinkles
Tortured, tumultuous turning to tremendous tremble
Wasted want what was where when why
Absolute erosion internal obsession utility
Hypnotized hopeful hot horrified hasten
Grace, gracious going God
Tick tick, terrible
Sudden serve sending seismic shopping spree
Seldom sending sorrow some soaring sights
Crap shit damn fuck
Bastardized beasts beyond breakage bearing bridges
Grimly gregarious goals grating ginger gridlock
Pious pretentious pedantic posturing penis
Dastardly downward descending depths
Vivacious voluptuous vixen verifying vanity
Erratically empty; enough
Tried to tempt the triumphant triad
Forever front from frontlines fast
Just justify justly jester!
It’s not enough
Tortured, tumultuous turning to tremendous tremble
Wasted want what was where when why
Absolute erosion internal obsession utility
Hypnotized hopeful hot horrified hasten
Grace, gracious going God
Tick tick, terrible
Sudden serve sending seismic shopping spree
Seldom sending sorrow some soaring sights
Crap shit damn fuck
Bastardized beasts beyond breakage bearing bridges
Grimly gregarious goals grating ginger gridlock
Pious pretentious pedantic posturing penis
Dastardly downward descending depths
Vivacious voluptuous vixen verifying vanity
Erratically empty; enough
Tried to tempt the triumphant triad
Forever front from frontlines fast
Just justify justly jester!
It’s not enough
Monday, February 13, 2012
I didn't get that creepy guy barber dude
I have a job interview tomorrow, so I went to get a haircut today. I'm going to shave tonight before bed, which--if all goes well--will be in about thirty minutes.
When I get my haircut in South Bend, I go to a Great Clips (GC). GC is a franchise chain, and this one is conveniently close and cheap, so winner winner chicken dinner. Plus I've never had a bad haircut the several times I've been there, except one time.
There's this really weird barber dude who works there. He always wears a tweed jacket that is too big for him and slacks that you don't typically see on a barber. You usually see those type slacks at church or in an office job. He's in his late forties/early fifties and talks in this strange Texan/West Coast surfer hybrid accent. I've only been close to him once (thank God), and if I recall correctly he smells like cigarettes.
This guy creeps me out. I had him once for a haircut and was ready to run away. He looks like a lizard and will not stop talking to you, even if you don't give any indication of wanting to continue conversation. I hate that. I hate small talk in general; but when I want to politely end small talk and it keeps going, I began to lose my patience very quickly. He was talking about personal stuff too. At the time I was going to Notre Dame, and I told him that. He wouldn't shut up about how "awesome" it was that I went to school there. He then started talking about how he got kicked out of community college in Texas for poor grades. What does he want me to do, tell him I'm sorry? I don't know, but it was awkward. He took forever with my hair, which is highly unusual considering the place prides itself on giving you a good haircut in an efficient amount of time. The haircut was awful, and I paid him a pretty poor tip. I take my hair very seriously, believe it or not. I strongly considered never going back because of him, but I'm lazy and didn't really want to look for another stylist.
He's there every time I go to GC, too. Without fail, every single time. With his tweed jacket that's too big for him and his big googly eyes. That's an even more interesting quality because I rarely see the same few stylists at the GC more than twice. They must go through stylists like underwear, or contacts, or something. I figured he was a manager with his attire and his constant presence.
Anyway, I go in today and, unbeknown to me, there was a sale. While that's cool and all, the downside was that the place was packed. I never have to wait for a haircut at GC; but today I had to wait 25 minutes, as there were five people in line ahead of me. Ironically, I usually take a book with me when I get a haircut. I never need to use it, though, because I never have to wait. This time was different, so I just stared at a "Fast Company" magazine until it was my turn.
Well, no. There was something else I was doing during my wait. He was there, twead jacket and googly eyes, working on some poor kids hair. Aside from him, there were only three other styists; and my natural catastrophic thinking doomed to realize I was going to wind up with him today. Of course, I don't recognize any of the other stylists, but I naturally recognize him.
Naturally, all the other stylists finish with their customers they were originally occupied with when I entered well before he finished his. One of the others may have finished a second customer before he finished his. Regardless, he finally finished his customer when there were two people left in front of me on the list. Turns out, he took the customer waiting in line RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. I breathed a sigh of relief, and got a female stylist.
She was chatty, and I would have finished the story with the preceding paragraph if something else didn't happen. We were discussing why I wanted my hair the certain way I wanted it, which lead to discussing my job interview tomorrow. She then revealed that she was the new manager of Great Clips, which she subsequently groaned and ran off to the back--interrupting my haircut. This was unusual behavior, but nothing really significant on its own merits. She comes back and apologizes. I notice tweed jacket guy returning from the back in a sulking manner. "He's in a bad mood today", she mentions preemptively. Taking this as an opportunity to discuss him, I pounce on it and ask her if he's, like, a manager or something. "Because he's literally always here", I supported my question. "Nope, he has no authority, just a stylist", she said, with some contempt in her voice.
So cool, maybe this stylist is just way too chatty, but apparently he had gotten under her nerves enough for her to say something about the guy to a random stranger. I am really glad the guy's a jerk, too. I don't like disliking someone just for superficial reasons such as "creepiness", especially if he's a saint who gets along with everyone outside of my experience. But he's not, he's just a jackass--like I figured he would be. But, come on, he wears a tweed jacket, EVERYDAY, to work as a stylist. There's got to be something wrong with him.
So yeah, I didn't get that guy barber dude, and my day was better for it.
When I get my haircut in South Bend, I go to a Great Clips (GC). GC is a franchise chain, and this one is conveniently close and cheap, so winner winner chicken dinner. Plus I've never had a bad haircut the several times I've been there, except one time.
There's this really weird barber dude who works there. He always wears a tweed jacket that is too big for him and slacks that you don't typically see on a barber. You usually see those type slacks at church or in an office job. He's in his late forties/early fifties and talks in this strange Texan/West Coast surfer hybrid accent. I've only been close to him once (thank God), and if I recall correctly he smells like cigarettes.
This guy creeps me out. I had him once for a haircut and was ready to run away. He looks like a lizard and will not stop talking to you, even if you don't give any indication of wanting to continue conversation. I hate that. I hate small talk in general; but when I want to politely end small talk and it keeps going, I began to lose my patience very quickly. He was talking about personal stuff too. At the time I was going to Notre Dame, and I told him that. He wouldn't shut up about how "awesome" it was that I went to school there. He then started talking about how he got kicked out of community college in Texas for poor grades. What does he want me to do, tell him I'm sorry? I don't know, but it was awkward. He took forever with my hair, which is highly unusual considering the place prides itself on giving you a good haircut in an efficient amount of time. The haircut was awful, and I paid him a pretty poor tip. I take my hair very seriously, believe it or not. I strongly considered never going back because of him, but I'm lazy and didn't really want to look for another stylist.
He's there every time I go to GC, too. Without fail, every single time. With his tweed jacket that's too big for him and his big googly eyes. That's an even more interesting quality because I rarely see the same few stylists at the GC more than twice. They must go through stylists like underwear, or contacts, or something. I figured he was a manager with his attire and his constant presence.
Anyway, I go in today and, unbeknown to me, there was a sale. While that's cool and all, the downside was that the place was packed. I never have to wait for a haircut at GC; but today I had to wait 25 minutes, as there were five people in line ahead of me. Ironically, I usually take a book with me when I get a haircut. I never need to use it, though, because I never have to wait. This time was different, so I just stared at a "Fast Company" magazine until it was my turn.
Well, no. There was something else I was doing during my wait. He was there, twead jacket and googly eyes, working on some poor kids hair. Aside from him, there were only three other styists; and my natural catastrophic thinking doomed to realize I was going to wind up with him today. Of course, I don't recognize any of the other stylists, but I naturally recognize him.
Naturally, all the other stylists finish with their customers they were originally occupied with when I entered well before he finished his. One of the others may have finished a second customer before he finished his. Regardless, he finally finished his customer when there were two people left in front of me on the list. Turns out, he took the customer waiting in line RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. I breathed a sigh of relief, and got a female stylist.
She was chatty, and I would have finished the story with the preceding paragraph if something else didn't happen. We were discussing why I wanted my hair the certain way I wanted it, which lead to discussing my job interview tomorrow. She then revealed that she was the new manager of Great Clips, which she subsequently groaned and ran off to the back--interrupting my haircut. This was unusual behavior, but nothing really significant on its own merits. She comes back and apologizes. I notice tweed jacket guy returning from the back in a sulking manner. "He's in a bad mood today", she mentions preemptively. Taking this as an opportunity to discuss him, I pounce on it and ask her if he's, like, a manager or something. "Because he's literally always here", I supported my question. "Nope, he has no authority, just a stylist", she said, with some contempt in her voice.
So cool, maybe this stylist is just way too chatty, but apparently he had gotten under her nerves enough for her to say something about the guy to a random stranger. I am really glad the guy's a jerk, too. I don't like disliking someone just for superficial reasons such as "creepiness", especially if he's a saint who gets along with everyone outside of my experience. But he's not, he's just a jackass--like I figured he would be. But, come on, he wears a tweed jacket, EVERYDAY, to work as a stylist. There's got to be something wrong with him.
So yeah, I didn't get that guy barber dude, and my day was better for it.
6 Pop Culture Mysteries That Were Solved by Fans (Article)
Finished: 9:35
Website: cracked.com
Synopsis: Explains six mysterious pop culture mysteries, ranging from movies to books to video games, and the circumstances and methods in which they were unraveled. Topics include, in order: [I]2001: A Space Odyssey[/I]'s IBM analogy, a fan's unraveling of the [I]Saw[/I] franchises final twist, the secret alphabet used in the [I]Legend of Zelda[/I] franchise, the famous but mysterious twang in the Beatles' [I]Hard Day's Night[/I], a riddle in [I]Alice in Wonderland[/I], and a mysterious woman in Charlie Chaplin's [I]The Circus[/I] who appears to be carrying a cell phone in 1928.
Highs: The Charlie Chaplin and Saw ones I found particularly fascinating, as well as the HAL mystery in [I]Space Odyssey[/I].
Lows: Zelda and the Lewis Carroll riddle. I found those to not really be in my interest and the payoff was so bland in both.
Final thoughts: Cracked articles that tend to investigate nuances in pop culture, such as this one, are my favorite articles. Not much else to say about this one, except that it was pretty entertaining throughout and each category was structured in a way to set up the mystery and then unravel it.
Rating: 4.0 out of 5 stars
Website: cracked.com
Synopsis: Explains six mysterious pop culture mysteries, ranging from movies to books to video games, and the circumstances and methods in which they were unraveled. Topics include, in order: [I]2001: A Space Odyssey[/I]'s IBM analogy, a fan's unraveling of the [I]Saw[/I] franchises final twist, the secret alphabet used in the [I]Legend of Zelda[/I] franchise, the famous but mysterious twang in the Beatles' [I]Hard Day's Night[/I], a riddle in [I]Alice in Wonderland[/I], and a mysterious woman in Charlie Chaplin's [I]The Circus[/I] who appears to be carrying a cell phone in 1928.
Highs: The Charlie Chaplin and Saw ones I found particularly fascinating, as well as the HAL mystery in [I]Space Odyssey[/I].
Lows: Zelda and the Lewis Carroll riddle. I found those to not really be in my interest and the payoff was so bland in both.
Final thoughts: Cracked articles that tend to investigate nuances in pop culture, such as this one, are my favorite articles. Not much else to say about this one, except that it was pretty entertaining throughout and each category was structured in a way to set up the mystery and then unravel it.
Rating: 4.0 out of 5 stars
Sunday, February 12, 2012
Flattop Grill (Dinner)
Time at restaurant: 7:00-8:00 PM
Style of food: Mangolian Grill (pick your own carbs/veggies/protein and sauces, not common in the South)
Company: GF.
Synopsis: Got there about 7. Ordered Thai Sticky Wings. My meal consisted of brown rice, many vegetables, eggs and tofu, chicken, kalamari, philipino sausage, and pork. Chosen sauces were peanut sauce, horseradish tofu, and pad thai sauce. I like to pack it in thick, and when it's a flat price for one bowl--why not? The cooking line was backed up when we got there, which was strange considering the restaurant was fairly empty. However, our food was cooked fairly quickly and service was by all means decent. NBA game played on television.
The highs: They played "My Back Pages" by the Byrds when I was getting my meal together. Waiter gave us wet wipes when we were finished with the wings (very convenient!!!). I saw a beer-gutted middle aged biker dude who had his entire arm covered in tattoos. I see that a lot in Indiana. GF and I discussed Needful Things, the book I finished last night (see review below). My cunning plan of ordering a diet coke after initially ordering a water worked out, as I got a free diet coke out of the situation.
The lows: Guy in a fleece-hipster shirt obviously checked out GF. I gave him a dirty look. I hate the NBA, so the game was a negative. While my cunning plan worked out, I was disappointed in myself for giving into my crippling soda addiction in the first place, so that was a double-edged sword that I luckily did not suffer from in a financial sense. At a table two down from us there was a high school couple listening to music on the girl's iphone. They listened to music the entire time. I hate the concept of sharing headphones, as it subjects one person to another's opinion on music taste. The other person has to agree the song is good otherwise he is going to cause unnecessary tension and complicate things. It's too much pressure on that one person. Also, the guy had a "shit-eating" grin on his face. I had read of "shit-eating" grins in various forms of literature, but this was the first time I had actually seen one in person. And it was clearly "shit-eating". This is a first. Actually, that could be considered a positive. Conversation with GF was energetic at first, but then got dull near the end of the meal.
Overall thoughts: Food was tasty, conversation was lukewarm, environment was a net positive, service adequate. GF said she loved this restaurant, which is good because I like it too. Overall a fairly average experience.
Would I eat there again? Of course, probably within the next month.
Rating: 2.75 out of 5.
Style of food: Mangolian Grill (pick your own carbs/veggies/protein and sauces, not common in the South)
Company: GF.
Synopsis: Got there about 7. Ordered Thai Sticky Wings. My meal consisted of brown rice, many vegetables, eggs and tofu, chicken, kalamari, philipino sausage, and pork. Chosen sauces were peanut sauce, horseradish tofu, and pad thai sauce. I like to pack it in thick, and when it's a flat price for one bowl--why not? The cooking line was backed up when we got there, which was strange considering the restaurant was fairly empty. However, our food was cooked fairly quickly and service was by all means decent. NBA game played on television.
The highs: They played "My Back Pages" by the Byrds when I was getting my meal together. Waiter gave us wet wipes when we were finished with the wings (very convenient!!!). I saw a beer-gutted middle aged biker dude who had his entire arm covered in tattoos. I see that a lot in Indiana. GF and I discussed Needful Things, the book I finished last night (see review below). My cunning plan of ordering a diet coke after initially ordering a water worked out, as I got a free diet coke out of the situation.
The lows: Guy in a fleece-hipster shirt obviously checked out GF. I gave him a dirty look. I hate the NBA, so the game was a negative. While my cunning plan worked out, I was disappointed in myself for giving into my crippling soda addiction in the first place, so that was a double-edged sword that I luckily did not suffer from in a financial sense. At a table two down from us there was a high school couple listening to music on the girl's iphone. They listened to music the entire time. I hate the concept of sharing headphones, as it subjects one person to another's opinion on music taste. The other person has to agree the song is good otherwise he is going to cause unnecessary tension and complicate things. It's too much pressure on that one person. Also, the guy had a "shit-eating" grin on his face. I had read of "shit-eating" grins in various forms of literature, but this was the first time I had actually seen one in person. And it was clearly "shit-eating". This is a first. Actually, that could be considered a positive. Conversation with GF was energetic at first, but then got dull near the end of the meal.
Overall thoughts: Food was tasty, conversation was lukewarm, environment was a net positive, service adequate. GF said she loved this restaurant, which is good because I like it too. Overall a fairly average experience.
Would I eat there again? Of course, probably within the next month.
Rating: 2.75 out of 5.
Needful Things (Novel)
Completed: Approximately 11:00 02/11/12
Author: Stephen King
Publication Year: 1991
Preceded by/Proceeded by: The Dark Half/Gerald's Game
Length: 736 pages (paperback)
Synopsis: A new store opens in the small town of Castle Rock, ME, selling novelties and knickknacks. The owner of the store, Leland Gaunt, is a charming businessman--getting on just about everyone who ventures into his store's good side. Strangely, the items on sell just happen to be what the customer needs in his life--whether to remind him of a good part of his past, satisfy or complement a collection, or enhance a hobby or passion of the person. Even more peculiar, Gaunt's style of doing business allows for the customer to purchase this desired item at a very low monetary price--instead opting for the customer to pay a prank on fellow townspeople in lieu of cash. The jealous protection of these items bought from the store and the anger initiated by these pranks leads to a growing ill will in the town. Grudges, insecurities, and vices that every one in every town has become exacerbated due to Gaunt's items, ultimately leading to the town's destruction.
Highs: (SPOILERS) Gaunt is a charming, well written character that is just as humorous as he is evil. Brian's suicide in front of his brother is rife with emotion. The characterization of most town folks is well thought out, and it's interesting to see how their characters match with the items purchased. As the rising action approaches the climax, the book is very hard to put down. The outlook for the town is ambiguous in the denouement, as several characters lives are ruined already, several are dead, and foreshadowing concludes that others' tragic turn has just begun. Even the long term future of the protagonist is called to question. A very bleak book that is in conflict with a very charismatic antagonist.
Lows: Middle of the book is dragging. Some of the prank concepts are fairly lazy (three of the pranks played on people are almost the exact same) and rely on sloppy structure to keep the plot moving. The falling action, and how Gaunt is defeated, is confusing and is not premediated from the plot at all.
My Thoughts: A fun book to read. A little deeper than a typical King novel. It can be suggested that the book criticizes the materialistic dependencies we have on things as a society, and our "need" to have certain things to make us whole and happy. Many people use these purchases as a way to escape the reality of their current lives, and this unhappiness in the current state of being leads to darker vices and habits as we become less happy with ourselves.
The humor in this book is appreciated, as Gaunt is one of King's more entertaining antagonists. The book starts off very strong, but does begin to drag along at about the middle point, when a new character is introduced fairly far into the novel. As said in the lows, the climax/falling action is not well done at all. It probably can be considered another of King's poorly thought out endings.
Rank in King's books? Definitely not the best, but very far from the worst. I'd put it right above the Stand but below the Shining. Probably my fourth favorite, though I've only read about 6 or 7 of his works.
Rating: 3.75/5 stars
Author: Stephen King
Publication Year: 1991
Preceded by/Proceeded by: The Dark Half/Gerald's Game
Length: 736 pages (paperback)
Synopsis: A new store opens in the small town of Castle Rock, ME, selling novelties and knickknacks. The owner of the store, Leland Gaunt, is a charming businessman--getting on just about everyone who ventures into his store's good side. Strangely, the items on sell just happen to be what the customer needs in his life--whether to remind him of a good part of his past, satisfy or complement a collection, or enhance a hobby or passion of the person. Even more peculiar, Gaunt's style of doing business allows for the customer to purchase this desired item at a very low monetary price--instead opting for the customer to pay a prank on fellow townspeople in lieu of cash. The jealous protection of these items bought from the store and the anger initiated by these pranks leads to a growing ill will in the town. Grudges, insecurities, and vices that every one in every town has become exacerbated due to Gaunt's items, ultimately leading to the town's destruction.
Highs: (SPOILERS) Gaunt is a charming, well written character that is just as humorous as he is evil. Brian's suicide in front of his brother is rife with emotion. The characterization of most town folks is well thought out, and it's interesting to see how their characters match with the items purchased. As the rising action approaches the climax, the book is very hard to put down. The outlook for the town is ambiguous in the denouement, as several characters lives are ruined already, several are dead, and foreshadowing concludes that others' tragic turn has just begun. Even the long term future of the protagonist is called to question. A very bleak book that is in conflict with a very charismatic antagonist.
Lows: Middle of the book is dragging. Some of the prank concepts are fairly lazy (three of the pranks played on people are almost the exact same) and rely on sloppy structure to keep the plot moving. The falling action, and how Gaunt is defeated, is confusing and is not premediated from the plot at all.
My Thoughts: A fun book to read. A little deeper than a typical King novel. It can be suggested that the book criticizes the materialistic dependencies we have on things as a society, and our "need" to have certain things to make us whole and happy. Many people use these purchases as a way to escape the reality of their current lives, and this unhappiness in the current state of being leads to darker vices and habits as we become less happy with ourselves.
The humor in this book is appreciated, as Gaunt is one of King's more entertaining antagonists. The book starts off very strong, but does begin to drag along at about the middle point, when a new character is introduced fairly far into the novel. As said in the lows, the climax/falling action is not well done at all. It probably can be considered another of King's poorly thought out endings.
Rank in King's books? Definitely not the best, but very far from the worst. I'd put it right above the Stand but below the Shining. Probably my fourth favorite, though I've only read about 6 or 7 of his works.
Rating: 3.75/5 stars
A New Motivation
After having this blog for about three months and not really knowing what to do with it, I came up with an idea that may actually give this thing a purpose.
Throughout most of the latter half of my life, I've been extremely critical. I typically hate everything, whether it be "Fight Club", "Glee", "Harry Potter", "The DaVinci Code", anything. You name it, chances are I hate it. I kind of began to realize this snobby "hater" attitude may be a detriment to my character this past holiday. I'm trying to change this and adopt a more positive attitude towards life. The range of this change goes beyond just things I hate in pop culture, but that is beyond the scope of this blogpost.
Last night, I watched two or three episodes of King of the Hill (KOTH) in a row on television (yes, a great thing to be doing on a Saturday night). I then went to my internet forum and discussed the episodes in the KOTH thread. I've been following this thread for about three or four months; and I like that some people are so invested in KOTH that they take the time to actually get into debates about their favorite episodes. This keen analysis and investigation into episodes of KOTH inspired me to do the same, and I decided I wanted to start watching KOTH critically--critiquing what I like and don't like about each episode.
I decided I would start to do this with each episode I watch from this point on; but after mulling it over some more last night, I decided I wanted to expand upon this concept. Why not critique everything I watch and read? From movies, books, tv episodes, even sports games? So...there was the nascent of this idea. And here it is in detail.
The time is 3:46, February 12th. From now on, for the time being at least...every piece of entertainment I take part in will be critiqued and reviewed. This is going to include plays, graduations, church services, tv shows, dinners out to eat (not meals I cook myself, however), movies, video games, sporting events, and books. I will put everything to a 5 star scale, with 1/4 increments. Zero being the worst. I am going to do my best to keep this going as long as I can. The only thing I will not analyze is music because I really do not have the capability to critically analyze that in a way outside of "it was good!" or "it was bad!".
I will try to make my reviews as thorough as possible. Aside from the rating, I will include a synopsis of whatever the event was, high points and low points, and anything else I can add. If I know I am going to take on a reviewable event, I will do my best to take notes to help me with my report.
Wish me luck, I finished a book last night and want to include that as my first review. I will start on that by the end of the evening (and before I complete any other form of entertainment.
Throughout most of the latter half of my life, I've been extremely critical. I typically hate everything, whether it be "Fight Club", "Glee", "Harry Potter", "The DaVinci Code", anything. You name it, chances are I hate it. I kind of began to realize this snobby "hater" attitude may be a detriment to my character this past holiday. I'm trying to change this and adopt a more positive attitude towards life. The range of this change goes beyond just things I hate in pop culture, but that is beyond the scope of this blogpost.
Last night, I watched two or three episodes of King of the Hill (KOTH) in a row on television (yes, a great thing to be doing on a Saturday night). I then went to my internet forum and discussed the episodes in the KOTH thread. I've been following this thread for about three or four months; and I like that some people are so invested in KOTH that they take the time to actually get into debates about their favorite episodes. This keen analysis and investigation into episodes of KOTH inspired me to do the same, and I decided I wanted to start watching KOTH critically--critiquing what I like and don't like about each episode.
I decided I would start to do this with each episode I watch from this point on; but after mulling it over some more last night, I decided I wanted to expand upon this concept. Why not critique everything I watch and read? From movies, books, tv episodes, even sports games? So...there was the nascent of this idea. And here it is in detail.
The time is 3:46, February 12th. From now on, for the time being at least...every piece of entertainment I take part in will be critiqued and reviewed. This is going to include plays, graduations, church services, tv shows, dinners out to eat (not meals I cook myself, however), movies, video games, sporting events, and books. I will put everything to a 5 star scale, with 1/4 increments. Zero being the worst. I am going to do my best to keep this going as long as I can. The only thing I will not analyze is music because I really do not have the capability to critically analyze that in a way outside of "it was good!" or "it was bad!".
I will try to make my reviews as thorough as possible. Aside from the rating, I will include a synopsis of whatever the event was, high points and low points, and anything else I can add. If I know I am going to take on a reviewable event, I will do my best to take notes to help me with my report.
Wish me luck, I finished a book last night and want to include that as my first review. I will start on that by the end of the evening (and before I complete any other form of entertainment.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)